Run - 1796 - 3 April 2022

Date: 3/4/2022

Hares: Sir Rub Her Turd and Sperm Aid

Run Number: 1796

Location: Torremuelle

Number of Hashers: 28

Virgins: 0

Visitors: 0

Run Score: 8.2

Anniversaries: 0

Report:

Legend has it that the Costa del Sol used to be known as the Costa del Viento, but it got renamed in an attempt to lure in unsuspecting tourists. On this blustery day, the 28 Mijas Hashers could see why, especially as they trudged higher and higher up the never-ending hills behind Torremuelle.

It soon became apparent that the glint of gold in the distance was not fool’s or hasher’s gold, but the top of Benalmadena’s Stupa of Enlightenment (and that is waaaayyyy up those hills!)

The trail was extremely well marked, to the point that the hares were accused of excessive use of flour. But for the hashers on the Malaga Hash on 29th January, the flour wasn’t needed, as a sense of déjà vu started to set in. This was exactly the same route! The truly enlightened ones even remembered exactly where the beer stop was located.

The beer and cava flowed and delicious orange (or maybe carrot) cake was consumed as the pack waited for Cardinal Colonic, complaining about too much concrete, to arrive.

Now, Sir Isaac Newton was a clever bloke when he said that what goes up must come down, and the Mijas Hashers, of at least equal intelligence, were relieved when they realised that after all that climbing uphill, the only way back to the car park was down, down, down. So off they gleefully trotted.

Back in the circle, it soon became apparent that there was a cup shortage for both cava and down down beer. So first into the circle were all the hashers who were lucky enough to have their own official hash drinking vessel but too lazy/forgetful/ungrateful* (*delete as appropriate) to bring them.

Sir Rub Her Turd and Sperm Aid had stepped in at short notice to hare, hence the repetition of the Malaga Hash route, and a few scores reflected this. Three people even suggested they should be awarded the prestigious title of Hash Shits! However, not enough votes were achieved, meaning that Muzzle Im holds on to the Hash Shit title he is so proud of (and so deserved) for a little longer. Better luck next time, Muzzle Im!

Other down downs were given, but the star of the circle was returner/visitor Chicken George, who managed to gatecrash Cardinal Colonic and Gang Bang’s honeymoon in Thailand. He’d even managed to lure Colonic away from his newlywed marital bliss to take part in his Tinman Hash. Colonic said the hills there made the trek up to the stupa look like a walk in the (flat) park, and Chicken George was duly punished, as was his suitcase.

The hashers who went to the on on were treated to a feast of garlic pizza and other Italian delights, plus drinks, which everyone agreed was delicious.

Well done, Sir Rub Her Turd and Sperm Aid, especially as everything was organised at such short notice.

Finally, Hashers were reminded to sign up for the Glamp Out in Tarifa and to keep an eye out on the website for details on the 1,800th run. On on!