Run - 1791 - 5 March 2022
Run 1791
Date: Saturday 5th March
Hare: Just Say When
Loation: Teba Castle
Hashers: 28
Scribe: JerryCan
The castle atop the hill turned out to be cold and windswept, so no delay in getting the run started. Too windy for markings, so just as well there were no visitors or virgins. The trail went down into the edge of the village, then back up to the ruined castle, and down again to the first macho/wimp split. I understand the macho runners clambered down the hillside and ran around some olive groves before crossing the road to re-join the main trail. The machos were treated to another mountain climb before joining everybody at the Beer Stop – nicely sheltered under a cliff overhang.
Refreshed with liquid, cake and oranges, the pack ventured back out and onto a Check Back, from which Salmonella Rushdie short-cutted accidentally onto the wimps trail – the look of panic on his face when he realised! The macho trail (which I observed from a safe distance) climbed up the mountain and past some caves. Blind Dick and Garden Stools complained about not being provided with mountaineering equipment.
With machos and wimps back together (though with the wimps way ahead), another Check Back saw the trail zig zag down the hill (I don’t think anybody took the death-defying short cut even though it was marked with flour) and along the valley floor towards the gorge. We scrambled over rocks (large and small) and jumped across the stream several times before finally sighting the bridge that marked our salvation. At one point I looked ahead and saw what I thought was a hasher climbing vertically up the cliff – fortunately it turned out to be a cute Spanish girl absailing down!
The pack decided they wanted to have the circle at the B point, warmth winning out over the unsavoury background of an empty swimming pool with sewers emptying into it. The Hare was congratulated for her efforts and a wonderful trail, which Mummys Boy averaged at 9.8 (I think his calculator gets a bit wonky at times!).
The RA (From Behind), and guest RAs, handed out some well-deserved Down Downs:
Chutney Ferret was presented with his 70th birthday hat and re-named King Ferret for the weekend;
Sharing a room, Blank Wanka woke up with a split lip and Aquasex’s knickers were round her ankles (your guess what happened to cause this);
Two hashers were evicted from the hostel for holding a doggy orgy;
Several hashers were named in a story about the ordering of the cake, which involved a bakery and Mercadona, and three different delivery days;
Kindergarten Cop was punished for being confused about where he had to pick up the cake: Teba he insisted – turned out to be Calle de Puerto Teba in Campillos (his excuse was that he speed read the message and therefore missed the important little detail)
The macho runners were punished for various macho type offences
SpermAid obviously doesn’t trust Rub Her Turd’s sense of direction as she sent him a ‘pin’ to make sure he found his way from the A to B points with her car (even though he was in a convoy).
All that remained was to celebrate Chutney Ferret’s 70th birthday, which was done in the now customary messy style, though I did think the 70 mini Down Downs could have been put to better use (beer spillage on a grand scale!). Assistant cake-maker, Comes More Often, poured in eggs and flour and provided Chutney Ferret with a birthday spanking (photo on the website).
